Five Crackers

How good do you run? Not like me, that's for sure.

Saturday was the first day in a couple of weeks that I felt pretty decent. I went to mini's 9AM basketball game and then took the family to lunch. I drove with the windows down, because in G-Vegas, sometimes February hits 65.

The Mrs. managed to find a place for both kids to stay that night, each at one of their friend's houses. We decided we'd go to dinner. I even had a drink. With alcohol.

Things took a turn for the worse not soon after.

We got home and got a phone call. My daughter had a fever and didn't feel well, so the Mrs. went to pick her up. We all went to bed and slowly, but ever so surely, my dinner decided that normal digestion processes were out of the question.

I laid down in bed and the mere thought of what I had for dinner made waves of nausea rise and crash against my weakened body. I'm a trooper though and rarely vomit. I figured I could sleep it off. Sleep? Did someone say sleep?

I awoke at 7:30 am and did my duty to God and Country. It wasn't pretty. I stumbled back to bed and went to sleep again.

I awoke at 9:30 am and did my duty to God and Country. It was less pretty. I stumbled back to bed and went to sleep again.

I awoke at 12:30 and managed to drink some water with ice chips. I lasted until about 2:30pm and went back to bed for more sleep.

I awoke at 6:30pm and had some diet Canada Dry ginger ale and 5 saltine crackers. I lasted until 9pm. Crash. Back to sleep.

I awoke at 7am this morning. Feeling better, but not 100%, I willed myself to work with a box of saltines and some Lipton Diet Green Tea.

There's a game tonight at Gucci Rick's. I'm gonna fucking play in that game if it kills me.

What's next? Measles?